I'm 50 years old, and I grew up thinking that being "colorblind" was synonymous with being anti-racist.
I know better now, but at what cost? 600 years of black oppression.
For SIX-HUNDRED-YEARS, beautiful black lives have been cut short at the hand of ruthless, privileged white people. This brutality is ingrained in their history, and it is heinous and inexcusable.
Below, from NPR.org is a non-comprehensive list of black lives taken at the hand of police brutality over the last 10 years. Read their names. Remember them, the ones who came before them and fight for those who suffer now.
I've been peeling off the film of misinterpreted colorblindness for decades, but the peeling has stopped and the bandaid ripped.
I hear the call for action.
I hear the call for education.
I hear the call for authentic justice and peace.
I am listening and processing.
My youngest son has beautiful brown skin. He's Haitian, His mother carried him in her womb during the January 2010 devastating earthquake that further crushed an already 5th world country. Jordany was born just 2 months later.
When Jordany was 18 months old, his mother had no more resources to feed, clothe or provide shelter for him. She painstakingly determined that his only chance for survival and for a future was for him to be adopted. So, she brought him to an orphanage where our family was matched with him.
We worked for 3 long years to bring our son home, and finally in 2014, the week after he turned 4, we brought Jordany home, and our family of 6 became our family of 7.
He's beautiful. He's black. He's adored by his friends. He’s joyful. He’s helpful. He has endless amounts of energy and friends to expend that energy with!
Of course the narrative changes for each child as he or she grows up, and we have traversed those changes and challenges with our 4 white children.
Jordany’s experience and narrative will be different...it is different...harder, almost impossible even to teach him that his skin color puts him at great risk for abuse, false accusations, and even death.
As his parents and his siblings, this narrative is more than uncomfortable, but we must learn how to navigate these waters, step up, better educate him and ourselves. We must teach him with solid, valid resources and black mentors.
Jordany’s history is unique.
At home we have taught and are teaching Jordany about the beauty of his native country, the strength of its people and also its history of oppression, poverty and neglect, The government itself does not provide resources for its men, women and children.
At school, Jordany is learning American history. He has learned briefly about slavery. He knows about Black Americans like Rosa Parks, Jackie Robinson, Martin Luther King, Jr. and many more. However, American history books are skewed to the white population, leaving out significant detail spanning back 400 years. The history books need to be rewritten.
As a white family raising a black child in an upper-class, predominantly white, safe neighborhood, we cannot let Jordany live here with a false sense of safety. He has to know more...the reality of growing up black and the risks that come with that.
At my prompting, Jordany and I discussed the murder of George Floyd. Jordany was unaware. However, I felt it necessary to tell him the nightmarish story of a white police officer and accomplices who relentlessly suffocated Mr. Floyd to death because he was black. Jordany does not understand such violence, but we have to continue to raise his awareness in an age appropriate way.
We have discussed skin color and that some white people will hurt black people with words and actions just because they are black.
Today, though, and over the last 10 days, people are marching in the streets peacefully (for the most part) protesting police brutality and the unequal treatment of and suppression of persons of color.
Jordany knows that his siblings in New York and in Tennessee are marching for these same reasons. They are protesting against black inequality and speaking up with words and actions. While they fight for the , African American community at large, they are also fighting for their brother and his future.
Change must happen!
Many of us white folk have recently learned that black parents have to teach their children lessons that don’t exist in any child-rearing book I have ever read.
As a white person, think about having to give your children these warnings before they leave the house:
Don't wear the hood on your hoodie when walking around
Keep your hands out of your pockets because someone might think you’re carrying a gun.
When you buy something at a store always get a paper receipt and the store-branded bag.
When you’re pulled over by a police officer, don’t reach for your license and registration. Keep you hands on the steering wheel in full view.
No child of any race, color, tribe or people group should have their very lives dependent on such simple, everyday actions.
Jordany, we will step up for you and every person of color in order to stop such inhumane treatment and breaking of humane boundaries.
My 4 adult children didn’t learn these lessons. We didn’t ”need” to teach them. We need to teach them now, though, because they need to know, we need to know, how to stop this.
Our family is seeing more clearly the gravity of what Jordany needs to know because he is black, and we all want to stand up for a future...sooner than later... where inequality does not exist.
Our beautiful, joyful boy has not experienced blatant racism... perhaps subtle innuendo that he did not recognize, but I did.
Jordany is a light. Black America is light! Stand up and do not tolerate racism and inequality. Do not excuse, ignore it or turn a blind eye.
Equality is essential to survival. Diversity is the foundation for life.
I am a lover of humankind, and I will do my part to fight for change, to understand more clearly, educate myself and do what is right and good and kind on behalf of Black America.
Our family will do the same for Jordany. We will continue to teach him as we learn from authentic sources.
I am listening to voices in the black community. You should too. Here are just a few that have impacted me greatl:
I watched and listened to Ivirlei Brookes talk about " White Women Who Truly Want to Help" on Instagram TV.
I am reading Between the World and Me by Ta-Nehisi Coates and will continue to read more and more and more. There are a myriad of wonderful books.
I am listening to a podcast between Ibram H. Kendi and Brené Brown on how to be an anti-racist.
Yesterday, My husband and I sat down with Jordany and watched the CNN/Sesame Street Racism Town Hall. It was educational for all of us, and it was age-appropriate for Jordany.
I have pre-ordered Ibram X. Kendi's new board book for kids called Antiracist Baby
I know that I have a lot more to do, and so do you my white friends and family.
I hear you my black friends
I love you
I see your blackness, and it is divine because...
Color is what makes the world beautiful, and it should always be seen because that's where love lives.
Comments